Keep the big deals BIG
This is applied coaching in the form of a love note
If you're making little things mean a lot, you're not paying attention to the big things.
Boom.
Making the little things mean a lot is why you feel deflated, defeated, tired, and alone.
What are the little things that are getting your attention these days?
Laundry on the floor?
A cold greeting?
A meeting no show?
A long wait in traffic?
Piles and piles of dishes?
How many macros you've had?
How many calories you've burned?
That one more thing you just have to have/do/be.
Why do you care?
What's the big deal? Literally.
What is the big reason why any of those little things matters to you?
PAUSE RIGHT NOW AND ANSWER THAT.
if you're feeling stuck, I guarantee that your fixation is a distraction designed to keep you right where you are.
Here's what's going on: Your beautiful, perfectly human brain is making a HUGE deal out of those little things so that you don't have the time, energy, gumption, interest or willingness to look at the big things.
When you're preoccupied with the little things, you will never voluntarily explore the why, deal with the pain, the root cause, or look at what you're deeply, truly afraid to see, because....
If you look with openness and curiosity about what you’re trying to make that little thing mean - instead of self-harming judgement, self-hate, self-destructive sabotage - you will see the big thing you've been missing. And you’re gonna want it. And once you have that clarity, you won't be able to abide your brain's BS anymore. You will have to do something about it. You will be compelled, driven, and inspired into change. Because the big thing is worth it.
Your brain doesn't want change because it's unknown.
It's afraid of the unknown because there are inherent risks and possible negative feelings you might feel in those scenarios.
Your brain patronizingly tricks you into perpetuating the time-suck of all of the millions of little things instead.
It is so much easier, and way less risky for you to passively comply with those little distractions that gobble up your time, your energy, your money, your days, your life.
Recognizing this is the first step to breaking out of the hassle, hurt, hustle, and drama.
Then, you gotta dig - ask yourself why this matters? What would it mean if you had it your way? What are you making that mean that you don't have it? What are you making it mean about you?
See, once you pause to notice the big things, as it’s so often the case, you may find that you're trying to get/be/do/have the little things so that you can believe that you’re worthy, or loved, or appreciated, or valued, or valuable, or good, or enough.
When you find that thought - the one that's buried under the little things that's causing you so much pain and anxiety - then you can clean your thinking up.
When you see the big thing that you really want, the little things become less consuming.
When you’re clear on the big things that you really want, you can do the healing, the forgiving, the reframing, the intention setting, the visioning, the strategizing, and the planning.
And THAT is the place you want to live from.
That is the driving mindset that makes peace, joy, sufficiency, love, enoughness, and abundance possible.
The pain of the little things is just showing you you're ready.
If you'd like some help unpacking, unloading, reworking and getting there for yourself, join the Level Up Membership where you'll get private one-on-one coaching PLUS group coaching PLUS all the training and support as you learn more about why your thoughts are doing what they're doing and how you can use that good science to understand and then love, heal, forgive, and achieve whatever it is that you want in your life.
Recap
If you're making little things mean a lot, you're not paying attention to the big things and making the little things mean a lot is why you feel deflated, defeated, tired, and alone.
Keep the big deals the big deals.
When you see the big thing that you really want, the little things become less consuming and then you can do the healing, the forgiving, the reframing, the intention setting, the visioning, the strategizing, and the planning.
And THAT is the place you want to live from because that is the driving mindset that makes peace, joy, sufficiency, love, enoughness, and abundance possible.
Tarah Keech is a Master Life Coach, a burnout prevention and recovery expert, and has a Master’s degree in Clinical Psychology and a resume of Fortune 100 consulting.
No, she can’t read your mind but she knows how your thoughts work and can help you see them and then use them so you can level up your life personally and professionally.
Basically, she’s a combination of strategist, mentor, and bestie. Except she gives you better advice than your friends do and she teaches you how your brain works so you can take informed action that creates real change.
She helps smart leaders level up their businesses and lives in the Level Up Membership.
And to connect with Tarah directly, complete this form.
